Nothing Changed And It Stopped

You changed nothing. That is the part that will not let you alone.

Same prices. Same work, done the same way, to the same standard. Same people, most of them still there. You did not get slower and you did not get careless and you did not put anybody's back up, and you have checked all of that about nine times.

And the month emptied out anyway.

If you had done something, there would be a handle on this. You could be sorry about it, or fix it, or at least know. What you have instead is a month with no cause in it, and your mind will not accept that as an answer, and so it keeps going back round looking for the thing it already failed to find.

I am not going to tell you how to fill the diary, because that would be strategy and there is none of it on this site. And I am not going to tell you the quiet is teaching you anything, because I do not believe it is. I am going to show you a verse that gives you permission not to know.

The secret things belong unto the LORD

There is a sentence at the end of Deuteronomy 29 that divides the world into two piles, and most people only ever notice the second pile.

It is about what is ours to handle and what is not, and it is said plainly, with no apology for the division.

The secret things belong unto the LORD our God: but those things which are revealed belong unto us and to our children. (Deuteronomy 29:29, King James Version)

You have a pile of things that are not yours to carry, and this month has never once been required to explain itself to you. Deuteronomy 29:29 divides what belongs to God from what belongs to us and does not apologize for the division, and the Holy Spirit is the one who brings that to a kitchen table with a ledger and a cold cup of tea on it.

Look at the shape of that. Two piles, clearly named. The secret things, which are God's. The revealed things, which are ours and our children's, and which we are responsible for.

Which means there is a whole category of things that a person is not being asked to account for. Not because they do not matter. Because they are in the other pile.

You are able to put this month in the other pile, and doing it has never once been giving up. The Spirit of God is the one who makes one dividing sentence from the end of a covenant reach a woman with a pencil over a ledger, and Deuteronomy 29:29 keeps the secret things on God's side without calling anybody incurious.

Why your mind will not stop

Let me say why the searching continues, because understanding the mechanism is most of what helps.

A mind treats an unexplained bad outcome as an unsolved problem, and it will not file an unsolved problem. It keeps it on the desk, and it brings it back up, and every time there is a quiet moment the file reappears, because your mind genuinely believes there is an answer and that finding it would help.

You were looking for something that is not there, and its absence has never once been a failure of looking. The Holy Spirit is the one who shows a woman what her own mind is doing with an open file, and the written word puts the secret things on God's side in Deuteronomy 29:29.

And there is a reason this particular month is harder than a month with a cause. A known cause can be corrected or forgiven. Nothing can be done with a cause that does not exist, which means you cannot act, and a person who cannot act will keep thinking instead.

The thinking is not working. It has been three weeks and it has produced nothing, which is exactly what it will produce next week.

You are able to close the file yourself, and closing it has never once meant the month did not matter. His Spirit is the one who lets a woman put down a question that has no answer in it, and Deuteronomy 29:29 says outright that some things are simply not ours.

Say it, and then work

So here is the exercise, and it is one sentence and one task.

Say out loud that this one is not yours to know. In the kitchen, in your own voice. This month is in the other pile. I am not going to find out why.

You are able to say that out loud, and saying it has never once been resignation. Deuteronomy 29:29 keeps the secret things with God and gives the revealed things to us, and the Holy Spirit is the one who makes one plain sentence possible for a woman who has searched for three weeks.

You will have to say it more than once. The file comes back up. Say it again, in the same words, and do not improve the wording, because the point is that it is the same sentence and not a new argument.

Then do one ordinary piece of the work that nobody has asked for yet. Not something aimed at discovering anything. The dull thing, done today, with your hands.

You were never going to be given the reason, and the work has never once been waiting on it. The Spirit of God carries a woman past a question with nothing in it, and the written word divides the secret from the revealed in Deuteronomy 29:29 and leaves the division standing.